Week 4 - Negotiating

Negotiating is a skill everyone needs and uses in their everyday life. It wouldn't hurt to be a great negotiator, but what exactly does it take to be a good negotiator?

In class, we looked at a variety of different 'types' of negotiating characteristics. Being aggressive, passive, looking for compromises, etc are all different things we can do in negotiations. Alas, what do we need in order to come up with the best (win-win) scenario?

Now I went ahead and looked at a few sites that explained how to be a better negotiator. To my greatest surprise a website called negotiations.com provided me with the most useful tips.

here are some points that I found about being a better negotiator:

1. Don't go into negotiations looking for a bunch of compromises.
This one is simple. As we have learned in class, "win=win" isn't really about compromises. It's about BOTH sides winning. It sounds weird, but I find that the truth is, negotiations aren't (always) a battle about who gets what they want. Sometimes the two parties aren't exactly enemies. sometimes.

2. One must understanding when negotiating.
What this means, is that one must know how their behavior or words will affect others. One must also understand that people have different ways of communicating, and the way they portray their beliefs will differ from other people. If we aren't flexible, negotiation will be difficult.

3. Listen
Yea, this is actually more complicated than it sounds. From the website, I found that

"You learn the interests of the other party through listening. Some styles are better at this than others, but the fact is that we are usually not good listeners. Most listen to reply, not to understand.
To illustrate this, consider the study that Dr. Albert Mehrabian, of UCLA, did on the ways we communicate when there is an incongruency / mismatch in communication:

• Words: 7%
• Tone of Voice: 38%
• Body Language: 55%"

Now, This came as a surprise to me, but it made sense. Students always get bored of monotone teachers, and teachers who sit in their desks talking into a microphone. The same goes for negotiating: if you aren't negotiating with the best presenter on Earth, it might be worth it to be responsive to the other party, and ask questions confirming the details s/he mentioned to let him/her know that you are indeed paying attention and do seek a good result.

I guess I'll work on these things and hope I can use them in the (near) future!